I've had this pair of glasses for almost two years now. They are not the ones I picked out. I picked out a pair of boring black ones, almost exactly like the pair I'd had before. But my friend Kinte, who worked at the store where I got them, pulled this pair out and told me to try them on. I squinted at myself in the mirror, only seeing PINK! PINK! PINK! But when I turned around, both Kinte and my husband told me profusely how great they looked and that I HAD to get them. I was dubious. I thought they were too colorful. That they wouldn't work with any of my clothes. That they wouldn't be professional enough to wear at work in my very conservative law office. But I gave in and trusted their judgment.

Kinte brought them to me a week or so later, when he came out to one of my husband's shows.  I put them on right away, thankful to have new glasses and to have gotten a really, really great deal on some really, really expensive frames. I tried to check myself out in the bathroom mirror, but you know how club bathrooms are. I couldn't really tell what I thought.

As soon as we got home that night I stood in the bright lights in our bathroom and stared at my reflection. And was thoroughly and powerfully smitten. What had looked shocking and bright and kind of tacky at the store suddenly seemed...PERFECT. Of course, it helped that I had corrective lenses on this time and could actually SEE the glasses clearly (that always helps).

I've always been very independent in my fashion choices. My parents allowed me to choose my own clothes and to dress myself when I was little, and never made fun of the very weird outfits I came up with (hint: I liked mixing patterns even back then, as well as wearing dresses over pants--no matter how frilly the dresses). I've never really followed trends or copied what my friends were wearing (except perhaps early in high school, at the beginning of my goth phase). I haven't generally looked to anyone else for fashion advice. But I learned the day I got these glasses, that sometimes other people can see what's good for me better than I can. And that when the time comes for me to take a risk, sometimes I might just need a little push in the right direction from someone I trust. I think about that every time I put my glasses on.

In another year or so, I may be ready for a new pair of frames. And next time, I will not go in and just find whatever is closest to what I already have. Next time, I will go in looking for something new, and different, and interesting. I'll go in ready to take a risk. And I'll be sure, once again, to take along people I trust.

You know.  Just in case.